Worry Window

A happy convergence of time, focus and idea…

I found myself reconnecting to an old self (and therefore, The World) yesterday, finding myself at a beach that requires at least a half-hour walk, a place that gives me refuge from anxiety, duty, and takes me out of my head. It’s also the place I go to for a reliable supply of my favorite carving rocks, a place I will never tell you about because, as far as I know, I’m the only one I know who carves these rocks, that is unless they are someone I see regularly, personally, maybe even sit side-by-side during a carving session after showing them my carvings.

I have to admit, I was NOT in a good state of mind when I first arrived at my beach, was downright SHAKEN in fact. But that’s a boring story and none of your business. But something fairly miraculous happened. I carved a “worry window,” a concept I had never conceived of until I took a short break from carving, checked Substack and ran into Sherman Alexie’s note he had posted just moments prior, a note about waking up from a nap, immediately verbalizing about a “worry window.

That guy scares me sometimes, because virtually everything out of his mouth, pen and fingertips punches me in the gut with significant personal relevancy. He can make me laugh, cry and seethe simultaneously or maybe in the course of a two-minute read. Mostly he makes me feel understood, because everything he writes makes so much sense. In this case, his verbalized what both our unconscious minds had been working on, conveying joy, humor and curiosity about the idea of a “worry window,” wondering if it were an established psychological term or whether he had invented it in an unconscious state. Me, I was unaware of Sherman napping or thinking, was just blissfully erasing my anxieties and calming overwhelming emotions by making what I now know is a “worry window” or escape hatch for all the shit that races around my head and heart trying to catch a break from me. It worked. It worked wonders.

As you see, there are two sides to my carving, an unplanned change from my standard habit of always leaving one side of a stone untouched. At the time of carving it, I had no particular intention, just knew I needed to take my mind off my thoughts. Looking at it now, the two shapes give me ideas, start me thinking what they kinda look like. Mostly I just see the gap, the hole, the place and thing that allowed me to feel free, to feel like me again. And having it in hand, I think I will better remember what I need to do to give a window or “out” for my worries.

Thank you Sherman for your post. Thank you to anyone who looked and read.